Wired

Before I became a (pseudo) grown up, I spent a number of summers working at a coffee shop at the shore called Coffee.Comedy. In case the name doesn't give it away, it is a coffee shop, Internet cafe and comedy club in one. Is your mind blown yet?


Anyway, since I am down the shore again I told them I would help out sometimes if need be, which turned into two, sometimes three nights a week. As it happens, my sister is working there this summer as well and since she is away this week, I am filling in all her shifts. This has allowed me to see many a beach goer in all their morning glory, and today's 7:30am-1:30pm shift featured some of my favorite customer interactions so far this summer. They included:


- A very large man leaning farther than necessary over the counter to order his coffee, then looking at the selection of baked goods on the counter, saying, almost to himself "hmm, should go healthy today," then louder to me, "what's this, pound cake? I'll try one."


- An older, confused-looking man who asked me, "are there any internets available right now?"


- An aggressively jovial, effeminate man who was there with what appeared to be his wife. She approached the counter ahead of him, ordered the coffee and asked if we had honey to put in one of the lattes and I told her we did. He then bounded up beside her a few seconds later, practically hopping from one foot to the other saying "Do they have honey, honey? Honey, is there honey, honey?" to his wife.


Then to me before she had a chance to answer, "Any honey, do you have honey for my coffee?"


"Yes," his wife and I answered in unison.


"Oh, where is it? Where's the honey, honey?"


I replied slowly, enunciating each word, "It is over there, on a shelf" I said pointing. "And I will give it to you shortly, after I make your coffee."


He wife snickered, but he was unperturbed by my sass and skipped down to the end of the bar to wait.